There hasn’t been an entry here for a little while, because I’m sick again. Stanley has plague-ily brought home yet another stinking cold, and transmitted it with finesse to both Fluffhead and me. So we are all producing interestingly coloured gunge at present. (My favourite colour is usually green. Not right now.)
Do you see the similarity with the cheese sandwich thing? I have nothing much to say. But I’m going to bravely forge ahead, as I sit here in my cheap beige polyester dressing gown surrounded by used tissues, and yak up some comments anyway.
For instance: I have strange viewing habits when I’m feeling ill. I feel an even greater need for distraction than usual (due to my obsessing about how I shall die of whatever malady, the woman-flu thing I mentioned earlier), but very little taste or judgement at these times. So I have been watching a non stop diet of romantic comedy/chick flick type films (for their comforting perkiness), and ultra violent 70’s Italian giallo (for their comfortingly lurid badly acted, badly plotted excellence). I could post about giallo, and maybe will one day as I love it and could rave about them for hours; but for the moment, here is a blog that hasn't posted for a while (shame), as this guy knows his giallo stuffs, and is handy with a summary...
BEWARE! MAJOR SPOILERS ON ALL FILMS MENTIONED!
So far, as I have degenerated downward into the abyss of eating whole large Blockbuster sized packets of Peanut M&M’s and Revels, I have watched:
1. Scarlet Diva
(This enters the list by way of having Asia Argento in it; the pixie daughter of the wondrous Dario Argento. This is described as a vanity film on her part; some reviewers described it as needing to be re-titled ‘XXX’. Hmmm. It’s about a star, and the mad lifestyle she lives. Crowds, drugs, sex etc. Asia Argento is very cute and sexy here (I’ll watch her in anything), but this film was one of those odd breeds of film I can’t quite get: the character does things that send herself so far away from herself, she gives herself away so much, that its no surprise she is where she is (which wasn’t a happy place). It was very well shot, shows her talent for writing, directing, and comedy as well as her amazing look. Wouldn’t say I enjoyed it though.)
(This enters the list by way of having Asia Argento in it; the pixie daughter of the wondrous Dario Argento. This is described as a vanity film on her part; some reviewers described it as needing to be re-titled ‘XXX’. Hmmm. It’s about a star, and the mad lifestyle she lives. Crowds, drugs, sex etc. Asia Argento is very cute and sexy here (I’ll watch her in anything), but this film was one of those odd breeds of film I can’t quite get: the character does things that send herself so far away from herself, she gives herself away so much, that its no surprise she is where she is (which wasn’t a happy place). It was very well shot, shows her talent for writing, directing, and comedy as well as her amazing look. Wouldn’t say I enjoyed it though.)
2. The Case of the Bloody Iris
(Had I seen this before – it was oddly familiar?? Very silly giallo – bouncy fun music, bad special effects, lovely Italian style and scenery and colours; Edwige Fenech (all hail one of the empresses of the exploitation genre), 2 very silly policeman, one a pure comedy turn, the other a stamp collector. And a quite good whodunnit element. Very enjoyable in a really badly written, badly acted kind of way. And who could forget the very bendy girl who does the ‘try and get me’ dance and fends off the idiot man so sexily in the nightclub?? That scene made me think I’ve seen it before, felt very familiar – and it showed so much of men’s attitudes to women – STILL. They think we are hunters who make fools of them; that we need to be subdued like wild animals who make no sense. Not all men, obviously….but still some. Worryingly. )
(Had I seen this before – it was oddly familiar?? Very silly giallo – bouncy fun music, bad special effects, lovely Italian style and scenery and colours; Edwige Fenech (all hail one of the empresses of the exploitation genre), 2 very silly policeman, one a pure comedy turn, the other a stamp collector. And a quite good whodunnit element. Very enjoyable in a really badly written, badly acted kind of way. And who could forget the very bendy girl who does the ‘try and get me’ dance and fends off the idiot man so sexily in the nightclub?? That scene made me think I’ve seen it before, felt very familiar – and it showed so much of men’s attitudes to women – STILL. They think we are hunters who make fools of them; that we need to be subdued like wild animals who make no sense. Not all men, obviously….but still some. Worryingly. )
3. Did You Hear About the Morgans’?
(Very citified couple about to divorce are relocated by the police to remote Wyoming due to a hitman threat. Culture clash/romantic comedy. Definitely seeing this again. Remembered from last year, when Fluffhead was much smaller, and I could go to my mothers and watch endless films with Fry, which we would talk all the way through, analysing for editing and script-writing changes we would have made. I liked this one, though somehow, this time round, I managed to miss my favourite line from it: when Hugh Grant says about his sleeping with Sarah Jessica Parker the night before, that ‘it was some of my best work’. And she replies, ‘I’m glad I was there for it.’ Only he could really deliver that line, that way. I really do like Hugh Grant’s later work. After he stopped being the annoyingly nice stutterer all the time. The change came around About a Boy – which was an excellent film. Still liked the film a lot this time round.)
(Very citified couple about to divorce are relocated by the police to remote Wyoming due to a hitman threat. Culture clash/romantic comedy. Definitely seeing this again. Remembered from last year, when Fluffhead was much smaller, and I could go to my mothers and watch endless films with Fry, which we would talk all the way through, analysing for editing and script-writing changes we would have made. I liked this one, though somehow, this time round, I managed to miss my favourite line from it: when Hugh Grant says about his sleeping with Sarah Jessica Parker the night before, that ‘it was some of my best work’. And she replies, ‘I’m glad I was there for it.’ Only he could really deliver that line, that way. I really do like Hugh Grant’s later work. After he stopped being the annoyingly nice stutterer all the time. The change came around About a Boy – which was an excellent film. Still liked the film a lot this time round.)
4. Life as we Know It
(Couple inherit baby. Learn to be parents. Ok, not that great. The baby slept when it should be being annoying – heaven knows, you get very little personal time with babies about, they don’t sleep when you are trying to have sex, they wake up and put you off! Then theres that great filmic staple, the baby poo scene. This felt obligatory – I don’t believe EVERYONE is nearly sick when smelling baby poo, and the retching – come on, get over it. I mean, Jesus, its not that bad. Tsk. I could’ve made this film way funnier.)
(Couple inherit baby. Learn to be parents. Ok, not that great. The baby slept when it should be being annoying – heaven knows, you get very little personal time with babies about, they don’t sleep when you are trying to have sex, they wake up and put you off! Then theres that great filmic staple, the baby poo scene. This felt obligatory – I don’t believe EVERYONE is nearly sick when smelling baby poo, and the retching – come on, get over it. I mean, Jesus, its not that bad. Tsk. I could’ve made this film way funnier.)
5. Bad Teacher
(A total user has to go back to a job she just resigned from as her scam to get a husband fell through. She searches for another…Not bad, quite funny – they didn’t bother trying to ‘redeem’ her character at the end either, they just took off her edges. I liked that. You got the impression she could still scam for gold if necessary; she just finally found a companion who made her think maybe it wasn’t quite as necessary as she previously thought. Though considering she was telling her parents she was dying and needed money for surgery earlier; that is quite a turnabout. Only film I have seen Justin Timberlake in where he has acted…blah-ly. Try him in Alpha Dog: there’s a performance worthy of his acting skill. I think he should stop singing and just be an actor.)
(A total user has to go back to a job she just resigned from as her scam to get a husband fell through. She searches for another…Not bad, quite funny – they didn’t bother trying to ‘redeem’ her character at the end either, they just took off her edges. I liked that. You got the impression she could still scam for gold if necessary; she just finally found a companion who made her think maybe it wasn’t quite as necessary as she previously thought. Though considering she was telling her parents she was dying and needed money for surgery earlier; that is quite a turnabout. Only film I have seen Justin Timberlake in where he has acted…blah-ly. Try him in Alpha Dog: there’s a performance worthy of his acting skill. I think he should stop singing and just be an actor.)
6. Penelope
(Gosh, a film with a U certificate in my list. How did this happen? I like Christina Ricci, this must be how – my rental list follows certain actors and automatically adds their films to my lists. Girl cursed with face of a pig (only the snout, really), has to marry to break curse. Tries to find husband. Turns out she was incorrect, can break the curse herself. Loveable rogue type is involved. A strange cultural mish mash of a film, set in a sort of England, a sort of London – where most people were American, hmmmmmmm – but I liked it. So did Fluffhead, who oddly paid attention the whole way through.)
(Gosh, a film with a U certificate in my list. How did this happen? I like Christina Ricci, this must be how – my rental list follows certain actors and automatically adds their films to my lists. Girl cursed with face of a pig (only the snout, really), has to marry to break curse. Tries to find husband. Turns out she was incorrect, can break the curse herself. Loveable rogue type is involved. A strange cultural mish mash of a film, set in a sort of England, a sort of London – where most people were American, hmmmmmmm – but I liked it. So did Fluffhead, who oddly paid attention the whole way through.)
7. Hall Pass
(2 men get the week off marriage after their wives are fed up of them not really being present in them (the marriage, that is). Strangely managed to be a lot more serious in point making – just here and there – than it could have been. Actually managed to deal with a few issues relating to feelings about infidelity and long term partnerships. Still moments of Farrelly Bros stupidity, funny and gross by turn. Odd appearance by Stephen Merchant, who fitted in well, despite being different to everyone else in the film in look and manner. One of those strange synchronicities.)
(2 men get the week off marriage after their wives are fed up of them not really being present in them (the marriage, that is). Strangely managed to be a lot more serious in point making – just here and there – than it could have been. Actually managed to deal with a few issues relating to feelings about infidelity and long term partnerships. Still moments of Farrelly Bros stupidity, funny and gross by turn. Odd appearance by Stephen Merchant, who fitted in well, despite being different to everyone else in the film in look and manner. One of those strange synchronicities.)
8. Don’t Torture a Duckling
(I’m not even going to attempt to do the plot summary. It needs to be watched to see how wrong, yet how right, its all is. Apart from (another all hail, here) Lucio Fulci’s very odd fixation with ducks, in more than one film (try the New York Ripper too), this was very good. It started off most odd, and was sleazy – yay, no surprises here – and was the usual badly written, badly acted, inconsistently plotted giallo. But as usual with giallos, it was lurid, wonderful, very disturbing and a good whodunnit. The sad witch character, killed wrongly, for basically being a nutter – a very sad scene, with excellent musical production (several later films having stolen the motifs here, as well as the idea the soundtrack played with; notably the fanboy Tarantino). The femme fatale, with no real depth. The priest who killed children to save them from descending into sin, to keep them in a state of innocence. The awful special effects. Very effective, very watchable, and quite sad. I will remember it.)
(I’m not even going to attempt to do the plot summary. It needs to be watched to see how wrong, yet how right, its all is. Apart from (another all hail, here) Lucio Fulci’s very odd fixation with ducks, in more than one film (try the New York Ripper too), this was very good. It started off most odd, and was sleazy – yay, no surprises here – and was the usual badly written, badly acted, inconsistently plotted giallo. But as usual with giallos, it was lurid, wonderful, very disturbing and a good whodunnit. The sad witch character, killed wrongly, for basically being a nutter – a very sad scene, with excellent musical production (several later films having stolen the motifs here, as well as the idea the soundtrack played with; notably the fanboy Tarantino). The femme fatale, with no real depth. The priest who killed children to save them from descending into sin, to keep them in a state of innocence. The awful special effects. Very effective, very watchable, and quite sad. I will remember it.)
9. How Do You Know?
(Reese Witherspoon, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd, Jack Nicholson. An unusual plot for a chick flick. Sportswoman loses job, has to re-organise life; businessman is stitched up by his own father, faces wreck of a life. Baseball pro in there somewhere, mostly as a contrast…Very good. Strange and slightly more layered and thoughtful than the average chick flick. Can’t quite put my finger on why.)
(Reese Witherspoon, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd, Jack Nicholson. An unusual plot for a chick flick. Sportswoman loses job, has to re-organise life; businessman is stitched up by his own father, faces wreck of a life. Baseball pro in there somewhere, mostly as a contrast…Very good. Strange and slightly more layered and thoughtful than the average chick flick. Can’t quite put my finger on why.)
10. Insidious
(Not a giallo or a chick flick! Just a regular supernatural horror. Some VERY good moments and a good idea. But strangely over razzmatazzed somehow. And that mask at the séance?!! Talk about kick you out of your suspension of disbelief! (Which was the exact opposite of the screenwriters idea on doing it, I got from the extras. He was trying to get people to see the obligatory seance scene in a different way. Whoops.) But a very interesting film. F’rinstance, that the main demon was played by the composer of the soundtrack. The screenwriter was also a character.)
(Not a giallo or a chick flick! Just a regular supernatural horror. Some VERY good moments and a good idea. But strangely over razzmatazzed somehow. And that mask at the séance?!! Talk about kick you out of your suspension of disbelief! (Which was the exact opposite of the screenwriters idea on doing it, I got from the extras. He was trying to get people to see the obligatory seance scene in a different way. Whoops.) But a very interesting film. F’rinstance, that the main demon was played by the composer of the soundtrack. The screenwriter was also a character.)
11. Morning Glory
(Unlikely story of a morning news programme getting revitalised by a perky young producer. Diane Keaton (who I usually don’t like at all, she just annoys me) does well at locking horns with Harrison Ford, who does even better at being very grumpy. It’s amusing. I can’t ever imagine being as devoted to a job as she is – unless it be writing...Hmmmm.)
(Unlikely story of a morning news programme getting revitalised by a perky young producer. Diane Keaton (who I usually don’t like at all, she just annoys me) does well at locking horns with Harrison Ford, who does even better at being very grumpy. It’s amusing. I can’t ever imagine being as devoted to a job as she is – unless it be writing...Hmmmm.)
So there you have it. And that’s only so far. The chick flickly things have outweighed the giallos due to the machinations of the people at Blockbuster and LoveFilm postal rental – sometimes you get what you ordered, sometimes you don’t. This afternoon I have a documentary about Gainsborough; which will be an amazing change of pace and probably welcome.
In the meantime, thoughts to have captured my sleepy and phlegmatic (in both senses) consciousness are these:
Was singing to Fluffhead, nursery rhymes. You know the blackbirds, four and twenty, baked into a pie, the dainty dish to set beforethe king? Well, I just wondered if that was a revolutionary song. Like – the revolutionaries were a Trojan Horse for the king, taking him by surprise, storming his counting house and taking his money hostage. Coming upon the Queen in her parlour and taking all that unnecessary bread and honey that she wasn’t sharing with the masses. Both of them doing nothing for the land and its people, just living off the fat? Or…the more sinister alternative – it’s a post revolution song, put out by the court minstrels as some sort of…medieval satirical jab (like putting someone’s head on a pike at the city walls but less messy and more witty). The revolutionaries have been caught, baked into a pie, the king and his court ate them (you know, literally or figuratively – in the olden times, people’s senses of humour could be quite skewy I’m sure you’d agree?). The status quo remained the same. The song is a warning….And here I am singing it to Fluffhead and …goodness, I really need to google this further, what am I singing to my poor innocent Fluffhead?!
(Though there is an even further alternative explanation. Actually there's loads.)
Lastly, I have been wondering if squirrels are part of the Fae. As in, here I am, always looking for faeries, at the bottom of the garden, or otherwise; definitely in greenery…and what I always see are squirrels. A cunning disguise, in plain view????
Ah. I’m sure I may well have had other thoughts, some of them possibly even interesting, but I really need to go and replenish my stack of tissues now. And find something both comforting and unhealthy to eat for lunch. Some dairy should help the mucus ensue! How about – cheese sandwich? Melted? Yum!!!
I hereby promise to try and write something either (a) informative, or (b) interesting – next time!!
This is actually the archetype of the Wendy blog post. Unerringly readable, babbly, and interesting.
ReplyDeleteI think the squirrels are just squirrels. Get a grip!
Babbly???? Moi! Harumph! :))
ReplyDeleteAH I hope you soon lose the greenies and feel better. It's funny cos I really love the minutiae too and squirrels - well you just have to be right.
ReplyDelete